How many (many many many) times have we heard that we are "the chosen generation?" That we were "saved for this dispensation." That this is the final dispensation... the last minute of the last hour of the last day (or however it goes) before the coming of the Lord.
I know those words have been repeated a multitude of times in my life. Its really hard to comprehend. In the great battle in heaven the 1/3 who followed Lucifer's plan were cast out and never received bodies. That means the the 2/3 who followed the Lord's plan were given the opportunity to come to earth, receive a body and be tested. Choose between Good and Evil. Light and Darkness. Love and Hatred. Right and Wrong. Every individual who has been on this earth fulfilled their first estate. They chose Christ. That is why they got a body. They were good. What happen? I don't understand how people can be so evil. We all start at the exact same place spiritually. The moment our body receives our spirit we are all exactly the same. Yes, we are all born into different cultures, times, beliefs, very very very different situations. But I still can't justify the evil some people commit in their life. Its disgusting. I don't understand.
I am a good person. I try hard to do what is right. But somehow I still feel like its not enough... because it is not. I have been given absolutely EVERYTHING. I have such an easy life. It's kind of ridiculous. I should be so much better than I am. But, i keep messing up. Keep making mistakes.
The end (of the world as we know it) is near. Its so so so close. I am almost certain that in my lifetime that "Christ will reign personally upon the earth and the earth shall be renewed and receive its paradisaical glory" (AoF 10). Things are getting so so bad. This world is going down hill faster than ever. As President Benson said in his 1988 General Conference address (the last time he ever addressed the church), "wickedness is rapidly expanding in every segment of our society." Its scary. I'm scared for the future. It keeps getting harder to be good. So many things tell us to fail. to sin. to lie. to cheat. to hate. to give in. I often doubt if I'm strong enough to say "NO! I won't."
But then... i read the next paragraph of President Benson's talk "I testify that the church and kingdom of God is increasing in strength. Its numbers are growing, as is the faithfulness of its faithful members. It has never been better organized or equipped to perform its divine mission." What joy! The church can handle it. It's member may falter. Many will fall prey to the lies and deceptions of the adversary. But I won't. In a address by Elder Ballard in April Ensign 2006 he said, “Joseph Smith made it abundantly clear that there would be nothing that would stop this work from rolling forward till the Great Jehovah comes forward and says the work is done. And He hasn’t said that yet.” (I couldn't find the exact link, but I know there are many similar addresses that speak of the same thing.) That simple statement brings me such peace. NOTHING will stop the work. No matter how bad it seems... or how bad it really is... there is nothing that will stop the truth. I am so thankful for that knowledge. So so so thankful.
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