Less than 3 weeks from now I'll be Ms. Hansen again. I've been preparing all summer. Plans. Procedures. Prayers.
I'm nervous for year two. Not can'tsleepatnight or butterfliesinmystomach nervous.
Last year was so hard. I wasn't happy for months following day 1, year 1. It didn't makes sense. I didn't make sense.
I'm nervous because I can't do that again. I can't struggle every.single.day. I won't make it.
... but that nervousness is lined with hope. sincere, genuine hope. I learned a lot during that year. I made a lot of mistakes, and was able to figure out exactly what didn't work.
I'm not dreading the year. I'm looking forward to it knowing that it can be painful and exhausting or exhilarating and exhausting.
I feel theoutcomeofthisendevordependsentirelyonme nervous.
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