1. I love the sunshine. It. Makes. Me. Feel. GOOD.
2. I'm looking forwards to summer with unparalleled excitement and anticipation.
3. I love my teddy bear more than anything right now; that cuddly little piece of fluff is my comfort. I cuddle with him every night, it's nice to have the reminder that I'm not alone, despite how my heart may feel.
4. I feel as though I've always fallen a bit short. I'm good enough to have some belief that I could be the best {at anything} but it never works out that way.
- - - I got a 3.996 GPA in high school
- - - I got the second best scholarship to a top 100 [70th] university
- - - I was accepted into the number [11] best business program in the country
- - - I have a 3.66 GPA
- - - I get 88s and 93s and even a 95 or two on exams and projects and papers... but never 100s
- - I'm so close to being the best that it hurts to fall short. time. after. time. after. time. after.... time.
- - If being second best, or 11th or 70th isn't really good enough... then what is???
- - Might as well be 99th or 136th....
- - If I'm not going to get a 4.0, then what good is a 3.6?
- This weighs on me. quite heavily.
- the thing is, if I wasn't so close to the top there wouldn't be such high expectations for achievement and it'd be okay to be where I am... but as is, I'm just losing.
- it sucks to be second. to know that you shoulda/coulda/woulda been first.... but aren't.
5. We, as humans, are meant to be in pairs: partnerships. I know this to be true. That's why being -one- is so hard and painful at times... it's unnatural
6. I have the best fam damily in the whole wide world
Instead of looking at who is better than you or what scores are higher than yours, think about all the scores that are below yours! Think about all the people who would kill for a second best scholarship but got none. You are pretty dang lucky girl! So instead of thinking you are only getting a 95% thats 30% above passing! That is AMAZING!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteI think you are awesome!