Tradition

Exciting News!
My roomie is getting married!!!! It wonderful and exciting and I am absolutely thrilled for Courtney and her future hubs, Nickoli (I'm not sure how to spell his name, so lets just go with it).

This, naturally, has caused me some reflection.

One thing that has been on my mind is the modern trend of heavy involvement of the bride in pre-proposal discussion and decision making.

I have heard of many many couples going ring shopping together. It's a good way to ensure that she gets the exact ring she wants... she will be wearing it all her life after all.

These girls often have dates picked, venues (temples) scheduled, decor and colors picked out, even bridal gowns purchased before the question has actually been "popped!"

I understand why this would work for a lot of girls, and for my roommate especially, but I hope to be utterly and completely surprised by my marriage proposal.  I don't want to go ring shopping; I don't want to know when he's purchased a ring; I don't want to know when/if he's talked to my dad yet; I don't want to know. I want him to plan a special, but comfortable date wherein he's nervous, with sweaty palms and shaky knees.  I want him to kneel in front of me and profess of his love and ask me to be his wife.  I want him to present me with a ring so breathtaking that I can't stop looking at it {after I've said "Yes" and kissed his adorable face}.

Maybe it's old fashioned (maybe I'm old fashioned).  Maybe.  But I love it so much.

I'll know he's got marriage on the brain.  I will too.  We'll have been dating for months and be madly in love. We'll know we want to spend our lives and eternities together.  I would never want to be proposed to by someone who was not sure I'd say yes.

Because I go to BYU, where everyone is getting married, I have been thinking about my wedding for a long time.  I have ideas of what I want and I know I'll be planning it in my head {long} before he kneels... but I want his proposal to be a real question.  I want him to ask me to marry him.  I want to decide in that moment that I'll put his ring on my finger and never take it off. {even though I will most certainly have already decided}

I think this will be reflective of our relationship as a whole.  I'm a big {HUGE} believer of courtship.  I believe that it falls on a man's shoulders to pursue a woman.  He should work hard for her affections.  He should ask her on dates and walk her home.  He should do the calling and the planning and the love-professing.  Only a man who can do this would have the courage and the strength to carry a family the way I believe a man should.  This is how it works for me.  Unfortunately, there are few gentlemen left so I'm still looking.

Last week, after spending a couple hours chatting with dear friends they stood to leave.  Some witty banter ensued and I said something to the effect of "... I'll let you know when I find him."  Steve said, "He'll find you."

I don't think he meant to be so unbelievably profound and touch me the way he did, but this struck me to the core.  "He'll find you."  .... .... .... He better.

I'm just a big fan of tradition.